Hi my dearest,

Nights like this are so rare with the hectic life, falling comfortably onto your chair, eyes closed and listen to your favorite old song again,and again. Repeats,and you wish this moment could last forever.

Din't like the idea of getting into a relationship ever since, since, I don't know, the last relationship I guess. And sometimes people around ask "why not just get together", it's not that you don't want to answer them, but you don't know the answer neither.And you felt bad for bringing out the reasoning that "it's stressful to be in a relationship"previously 'cause it's in fact not. It's just, the external factors that's bothering me.Only if my mum isn't such an such an extremist. When people say love is all about two person is, bullshit. Human beings are constantly brain washed and affected by people around them, their words their actions their behaviors.

K I will just be a coward and hide under the golden shield of "A level is coming" and not address the issue till then. Escaping away.

And you don't feel like you are being yourself anymore.
But you chose to keep on turning away.
I don't want to say this but, nah, you just don't understand my situation.